Angel Jake at the RBC (Rainbow Broadcasting Corporation)

Angel Jake at the RBC (Rainbow Broadcasting Corporation)

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

It Was Dogdad's Birthday, but Mom Aged a Hundred Years!



This was supposed to be a post showing what a good time we had celebrating Dogdad's birthday on Sunday. And yes, we did have a good time. Just Harry and I didn't get to have too much food (everyone was asked not to feed the dogs, imagine!!) -- but we had lots of loving and everyone was really happy.




That was Sunday.

Yesterday, Mom left us alone for two hours while she went shopping for a few presents for Dogdad (today, the 22nd, is his actual birthday). When she came home, she found a very scary surprise. One of the gifts Dogdad had gotten on Sunday from my human brother and sister-in-law (that's her below) was a pinata (a burro) filled with Ghiardelli chocolate squares and other sweets. Once Dogdad had extracted all of the candy, Mom put the squares into a secure container with a closed top and left it in the center of the dining room table with a few other things.

The surprise she found when she got home was an abundance of opened -- and empty -- chocolate wrappings all over the floor. She panicked, but then took a deep breath. She picked the wrappings up and counted them and looked at the weight of each (.375 oz per piece). Then she called the vet. After some discussion, she was reassured that the total quantity (nine squares in all plus some other non-chocolate candy that apparently the "perp" didn't like because the wrappers were opened but most of the candy was still there) and the type of chocolate -- only two dark chocolate, the yummiest but the worst for dogs, was within tolerable limits for dogs of our weight.


And now that 24 hours have passed, without any untoward symptoms, I guess Mom has relaxed a bit.

So who was the perp? Or perps?


We know the perp's motive, right?


THE EVIDENCE AS RETRIEVED FROM THE FLOOR


But what were his means?
THE MEANS: A TIPPABLE EMPTY WINE CONTAINER (WITH NO OPPOSABLE THUMBS, PRETTY COOL, RIGHT?)
And what was his opportunity?
THE OPPORTUNITY: A CHAIR NOT PUSHED UNDER THE TABLE!
Two dogs. No tattletails. Where is Inspector Butcho when we need him? When Mom discovered the empty wrappings, she forced open each of our mouths to sniff who had a chocolaty breath. Both of us seemed to, but she was pretty sure that it was I who had done the deed and not shared very much with my brother.

I did wake Mom up early this morning (5:30 am) with some heavier than usual panting -- but that was because I had to go outside really bad 'cause I had drunk more water than usual last night. And I had a little bit of runs (hard to see outside in the dark at that hour). That, combined with my previous trolling experience and excellent chair-jumpng prowess (plus an abundance of smarts), was enough to convince Mom that I was indeed the perp.



THE PERP!!!

SO, even though I seem to be OK after 24 hours, thank Dog, with no runs, hyper behavior, or anything else, I am definitely in the doghouse. And my doofus brother, who may or may not have shared in the escapade (I won't tell), is just his usual goofball self. But Mom has aged a hundred years -- which makes her a lot older than Dogdad at this point -- and has been kicking herself for doing everything right -- except forgetting to push one of four chairs under the table.

Foxies, gotta' love us, right pals!!!

Jake

15 comments:

Unknown said...

Wow you guys are goooooood! (Glad you are okay, by the way.) H-Mom insists does this stupid thing: she shouts "KITCHEN SCAN" and then someone runs into the kitchen. She shouts "DIRTY DISHES" and Samantha runs into her bedroom. And THEN they have the audacity to LOCK ME IN MY KENNEL. What do they think? I am going to raid the kitchen from behind bars? ... stranger things have happened ... cheers, my Florida neighbor!

Peanut said...

Oh man I'm glad you are okay. But good job getting that off the table and open.

Unknown said...

You're an acrobat! You know, the father of a friend of ours used to feed his Jack Russell terrier a KitKat bar every day! Mommy was shocked when she heard this. And the pup was never sick from it. Who knows?

Glad to hear you're feeling fine. Next time, go for the wine!

Your pal,

Petey

Lacy said...

w00f's Jake and JH, ok me iz sorrwy but mama laughed at the chocolate breath, she wooda prolly done that too...but u guys need to leave the candy alone..it can make u really really sickly...

b safe,
~rocky~

Gus said...

woohooo....scores three points from the chair and commits a foul. Poor DogMom...muzzers get worried about that sort of thing.

Generally, I let Teka do the climbing in this house. I am much more the opportunity grabber.

Muzzer and Dad did have an ESS right before I came to live with them, he regularly got the cat to toss him chocolates off the shelf. He was also known for suitcase surfing around Christmas time, and one year he and the Simames got a whole box of dark chocolate covered macadamia nuts out of Aunt Re's Suitcase! Wowser. Not even a hiccup from either of them. They were d*(&& lucky, I told them so.

I don't even get chocalatt icecream.

kisses anyway...(breathe some chocolate fumes my way please)

gussie

Patience-please said...

Oh we are so glad you are ok! Fat Charlie once got a POUND of DARK chocolate off the top of a bookshelf on top of a dresser. The servant was in time to squirt hydrogen peroxide down his gullet, and then she got to enjoy massive amounts of chocovomit clean up!

And thank you for your kind, kind, words. Our vet is also kind, kind, kind, and did not even charge the servant a penny for Sweetie. Not a dime.

wags from the whippets

Deetz said...

You look like you still have a lil chocolate around your mouth...hehe
Deetzy

Eduardo said...

OMD! My Mom would spank my but to high heavens if I did that! I bet it was worth the runs for that chcolate! I would probably do the same thing if my Mommy & Daddy let me out of my bed while they are gone, but they won't( jerks:( ). My Mommy's grandma used to have a chihuahua named Poopsy and they fed poopsy chocolate(the grandma not my momma)and at age 14, 20lbs overwieght Poopsy finally died of high blood suger. Mommy says thats why I don't get human candy. But it is tempting to steal, right? yeah, you know what I mean, heehee:)
Hugs & Snugs,
Eduardo the Snuggle Puggle

Koobuss said...

That was a wonderful trick, Jake. Way to go. I'm sure that feeling the way you did later last night was worth it considering all the yummy chocolate you ate. You were very smart to do what you did, but I think you may have ruined it on yourself for the future. Your mom will not leave anything where you can get at it any more. Oh well, it was fun while it lasted.

Love and Koobuss Kisses,
Koobie

Molly the Airedale said...

WHEW! We were holding our breath the whole time your story was unfolding! How scary for all of you! We're so glad this story has a happy ending!

Love ya lots,
Maggie and Mitch

Eric said...

Jake you are tooooo funny. I'm so waggging proud of you pal, what a very neat trick. And good on you to not to tell Mom you can move the chair too!!! I mean I don't think she deserves to know that after treating you so badly. FORCING your mouths open to smell you breath? How rude is that.I'm sure she didn't actually tell you NOT to eat the chocolates and that it was bad for you did she? No. How are we supposed to just know these things? Yep love us pups or perps one and all!!!

Wiry wags, Eric! did you pick up your award - we left a message on your previous post but blooger was not behaving....:(

Lorenza said...

Hi, friends!
Happy Birthday to Dogdad!
I just can imagine how your mom felt when she saw those chocolate papers!
Glad to know you are ok!
Kisses and hugs
Lorenza

Faya said...

Oh I wish I could kiss you right now.... I am sure you still smell chocolate and I do love chocolate...
Kisses, Faya

Jackson's J1 and J2 said...

OHMYDOGNESS! So glad to hear you're OK, Jake! I bet JH helped just a little bit, right? It's very decent of you not to dob him in. BTW, J1 thinks it was very brave of your mum to smell your breath! J x

Oorvi said...

Wow Jake! You're super-smart!
You see an opportunity, you seize it, and make the best (or the worst) of it. The point is - whichever way you look at it, you are ahead of all others:)

Chocolates! Hmmm! I used to get some chocolates before they discovered that it was poison for us! I should tell you that it didn't harm me at all.

I'm glad and not at all surprised that both of you are fine:) We dogs have strong stomachs!

Licks n Wags,
Oorvi